I'm An Ordinary Man chords and lyrics - HUBERT GREGG

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[Verse 1]
[C]I f[D]ind the moment I
[Em]let a woman
make friends with [D]me,
she becomes [G]jealous, exact[D]ing,
suspicious and a damn nuis[Em]ance.
I find that the moment I let myself
become friends with a woman,
I become selfish an[A]d tyrannical.
[C]So here am I, [G]a confirmed old [D]bachelor,
and likely to remain [G]so.
After all, Pickering, [Em]I'm an ordinary man
who [G]de sires nothing [D]more than
just the ordinary [G]chance
[C]to live exactly as he [B]likes
and do pre[D]cisely what he [A]wants.
[C]An average man, am I,
of no [G]eccentric whim,
who likes to live his [A]life free [Em]of strife,
doing [A]whatever he thinks
is best for [G]him.
[D]They're just an ordinary [G]man.
But let [C]a woman in your life,
and your serenity is [D]through.
She'll [G]re decorate your home
from the cellar to the dome,
then go [C]on to the enthralling
[D]fun
of overhauling [G]you.
Oh, let a [C]woman in your life,
and you're up against a [D]wall.
Make a [G]plan and you will find
she has something else in mind,
And so rather than do either,
you do something else
that neither likes [C]at all.
[D]You want to [C]talk of [D]Keats or [C]Norton,
but she only wants to talk of [Fsus4]love.
[D]You go to see a play or ballet
and spend it searching for her [G]glove.
Oh!
Let a [C]woman in your life
and invite eternal [D]strife.
Let them [C]buy their [G]wedding band[D]s
for [C]those anxious [G]little hands.
I'd [C]be equally as willing
for a dentist to be drilling
Than to ever let a woman in my [D]life.
I'm [Em]a very gentle man,
even [G]-tempered and good [D]-natured,
Whom [C]you'll never hear complain,
Who has the milk
of human kindness
[G]by the quart in every vein.
[A]A patient [C]man am I,
down to [G]my fingertips,
[D]The sort who never [A]could, [Edim]ever would,
[A]Let an insulting remark [G]escape his lips.
[D]Just a very gentle man[G].
But let [C]a woman in your life.
Her patience hasn't got a [D]chance.
She will [G]beg you for advice,
your reply will be concise,
and she'll listen very nicely,
then go out and do
precisely what she [C]wants.
You were a man of grace and polish,
who never spoke above a [Fsus4]hush.
[D]all at once, you're using language
that would make a sailor [G]blush.
Oh, let [C]a woman in your life,
and you're plunging [D]in a knife.
Let the [G]others of my sex
tie the [C]knot around [D]their necks.
[G]I'd prefer a new edi[C]tion
of the Spanish Inquisition
than to ever let a woman in [D]my life.[C][D]
[Em]I'm a quiet living man
who [G]prefers to [D]spend the evenings
in the [C]si lence of his room,
who likes an atmosphere as [B]restful
as [Em]an undis[G]covered tomb,
[A]a pensive [C]man of mine,
[A]of [D]philosophic [G]joys,
who likes [A]to meditate, contem[Em]plate,
free [A]from humanity's
mad inhuman [G]noise.
[D]He's just a quiet living [G]man.
But let [C]a woman in your life,
and your sab[D]batical is through,
In a line that [G]never ends
comes an army of her friends
Come to jabber and to chatter
and to tell her what the matter is
with [C]you.
She'll have a booming,
boisterous family
who will des[D]cend on you en masse.
She'll have a large Wag
[C]nerian [D]mother,
with a voice that shatters glass!
[G]Oh, let a wom[C]an in your life!
Let a [D]wo man in your life!
Let a [E]wo man in your [A]life![D]
[A]I shall never l[F#m]et a w[A]oman in my l[D]ife.