Santa's A Fat Bitch Chords

Lyrics & chords

[Verse 1]
[F]Sleigh bells jingling,
ring -ting [Dm]-tingling
[F]Toasties, toasties, toasties, toasties
Sleigh bells jingling, ring -ting [Dm]-tingling
Santa Claus, [Am]suck my balls
[Dm]Drunk as hell, ringing [Am]bells at the malls
[Dm]Dancer, [D5]prancer, [Am]Dixon and Cupid
[Dm]I'ma get stupid
[D]Ha ha ha, [C]bah
I [Dm]sat around all night u[Am]nder the chimney
Hold[Dm]ing my sack like, [C]gimme, g[Am]imme
I [Dm]know that he's coming,
he's [Am]coming, he must
[C]Lookin'[Dm] up, nothin' but rust[C], dust
[Dm]Turn on my [D5]TV the ve[C]ry next day
I [Dm]see you gettin' paid, [Am]leadin' the parade
[C]I'm[Dm] that sniper on the bui[Am]lding
Listen to my [Dm]nine -go click
[Am]Santa's a fat bitch
Santa Claus is a bitch
Santa Claus the fat, bitch
Another year and I ain't get shit
Another year, I ain't get shit
If I hear him loud no more
I'll rule my undertaker
I'ma bust your ass in there too
[D5]Yeah, I got something
to say [Am]about St. Nick
Fuck [Dm]that [D5]hoe, he [Am]nev er brought
Shaq shit
[Dm]No toys, candy canes, ju[Am]st a lump of coal
So I [Dm]eat it, cause there ain't
[D]nothin' in the cupboard
So [Dm]I'll be quick, [Am]quick and brief
All's I [Dm]need for Christmas
is my [Am]two front [C]teeth
I [Dm]got mine kicked, k[Am]icked out my m[C]outh
I [Dm]need a few new ones,
could you [Am]help me out?
[Dm]Should've known,
I [D5]guess it's all [Am]end of the [C]stick
[Dm]No kind of gift, I didn't get sh[Gm]it
[Dm]Some say I was [Am]bad, but that wasn't [Dm]it
It's all be[Am]cause Santa
was a fat bitch
Santa Claus is a fat bitch
Santa, fuck you, I've had my fun
Another year and I ain't get shit
Another year, I [G]ain't get shit
If I hear him [Am]loud, I'm out of
This is it, you're gone again
I'mma bust your ass in there too
Ha ha ha! Don't go that way,
Rudolph!
That's the ghetto!
[F]Ha ha!
Those boys and girls,
they don't deserve [Am]any thing!
[Dm]Santa Claus, Santa Claus, [Am]where you [C]been?
I [Dm]see you got cookies and [Am]milk on your [C]chin.
I [Dm]guess you had [D5]time to col
[Am]lect your [C]ends.
You've [G]always been down
for your rich friends.
[G5]But Rudo[D5]lph,
he don't really [Am]stay my [C]way.
[Dm]Nothing but coal and d[Am]irt for Lil' J.
[Dm]I guess You co[D5]uldn't fit
[Am]down my chimney [C]shaft
[Dm]You need to [D5]lose some
of that fat [D]as s, uh
[D5]All the [Dm]little rich boys,
[Am]they gettin' paid
[Dm]Countin' the [D5]toys and the
[Am]ducks they made
Me?
[Dm]I got [D5]a little half,[Am]
little chunk [Dm]of dog shit
I'ma [C]kill that [G]fat bitch
Santa Claus [Am]is a bad bitch
Too much Madonna
Another year and I ain't gettin' shit
Mrs. Claus is a [G]hoe
If I hear him [Am]loud no more
Santa's been to the big red coat
I'ma bust your ass in there too
Twas the [D5]night before Christmas
and [Am]everything's whack
Not a [Dm]creature stir[D5]ring, [Am]but a fucking rat
I [D5]ain't hearing jingle bells,
I [Am]ain't hearing nothing
Ain't [D5]smelling no turkeys,
sure [D]as hell ain't no [G]stuffing
[D]All that I [D5]paid, [Am]wished and prayed
This [Dm]fat motherfucker
would [Am]swing my way
And [Dm]drop off soldiers and [Am]rubber balls
But I [Dm]woke up and found
some [Am]crusty old drawers
[Dm]Yes, ship, I [D5]knew it, the [Am]shaft again
[C]And [D]again, and [Dm]again, and [D]again
[Gm]Every [D]year I wak[Dm]e up to the
[Am]same old shit
[Dm]How's there [D]be no [Am]sign of the fat bitch?
Santa Claus is a bitch
[Am]Santa Claus the fat, bitch
Another year and I ain't get shit
Another year I [G]ain't get shit
If I hear him [Am]land on my room
I [G]am the taker
I'ma bust your ass in there [Am]too
[D]Santa Claus [C]is a fat,
[D]Santa Claus the [Am]fat, fat, [C]fat
Another [D]year and [Am]I ain't get[C] shit,
[D]I ain't get s[Am]hit
[C]If I hea[D]r him lan[C]d on my [Am]roof,[D]
[Am]I'ma [C]bust your
[Am]ass in there t[D]oo y[Am]ou