The Buffoon And The Valedictorian Chords

Lyrics & chords

[Verse 1]
Performed by Adam [D]Sandler and Jennifer Lien "And now the buf
[Em]foon's date at the drive- [D]in with the [E]school's valedictorian."
[Em]Va ledictorian: "I really appreciate y[B]ou're asking me out. Most
[E]people are intimidated [Em]by my high academic achievement."
[E]Buffoon: "This movie sucks shit!"
Valedictorian: "Well, Ebel gave it thumbs up,
but Ciscel thought it was too preachy. Anyway, I enjoyed [A]the director's last film [Em]immensly."
Buffoon: "Cathleen Turner has big
fuck[E]in' tits!"
Valedictorian: "Yes, well, [Em]she recently had a [E]child. I think her maternal biology may play a role in that.
She looks fabulous for a woman her age, doesn't she?"
Buffoon: "I put a firecracker in a bullfrog's mouth
and blew [D]his fuckin' head off."
Valedictorian: "Well, in psychology we learned that it is not uncom[B]mon for male [E]adoles
cents to commit savage acts on animals as part of [A]their maturing pro[E]cess."
[Em]Buffoon: "That girl in [E]the fucking car in front of us,
she gives everybody head."
[D]Valedictorian: "Well, I guess she's str[E]ong for attention
and she feels promiscuity is the only way to [D]ob tain it."
[E](Buffoon eating popcorn)
Buffoon: "This popcorn's fuckin' terrible. It tastes like
someone jizzed all over it."
(Buffoon continues to eat popcorn)
Valedictorian: "Well the amount of semen on this popcorn is certainly disturbing. Perhaps the staff in the refreshment
stand was overcome by the monotony of their work and decided to play a childish prank."
Buffoon: "I looked at my asshole in [D]the mirror today.
It blew my fuckin' mind!"
Valedictorian: "It's ironic that parts of one's body [Em]seems odd and u[E]nusu
al because you don't see them on a day to day basis.
Buffoon: "My father's [Em]shit stinks up the [D]bathroom
all [E]fuckin' day!"
Valedictorian: "It's puzzling [D]why one person's fecal odor can be [E]more overpowering [A]than another's.
[D]I wonder whether it is a function of the food diges[Em]ted or that person's internal met[E]abolism."
Buffoon: "I'm gonna go get [B]head from
that [D]fuckin' girl."
[E](Gets out of the car)
Valedictorian: "Well, I'm sorry to see the
date come to such an abrubt conclusion."
(Buffoon walking away)
"I do appreciate the time you [D]spent with me and look forward
[Em]to a future [D]rondevue."
Buffoon: "I like to piss in that
guy's fuckin' gas [D]tank!"
Valedictorian: [Em]"Bye bye! Have [E]fun."[C#m]
[E][G]
(Buffoon continues to walk away)