You Mean You Were Raped? (Nortius Maximus) chords and lyrics - MONTY PYTHON

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[Verse 1]
[G][D][G]
Have I got a big nose,
Mum?
[C]Oh, stop thinking [D]about sex!
[A]I wasn't!
You're always on about it!
[D]Morning, noon and night!
Will the girls [G]like this?
Will the girls like that?
[C]Is it too big?
[G]Is it too small?
Well, there's a reason it's like it is,
Blonde.
What is it?
Your father isn't
Mr.
Cowan.
I never thought he was.
Now, none of your cheating!
He was a
[E]Roman,
[D]Brian.
[G]He was a centurion [E]in the
Roman army.
You mean, you were raped?
Oh, at first, yes.
Who was it?
Nautius
Maximus, his name was.
Promised me the known [E]world, he did.
I was to be taken to
Rome.
Passed by the four slaves.
Asses ruled.
As [F#]much gold as I could eat.
Then he, having his way with me,
he had...
Boom!
like a rat out of an aqueduct.
The bastard!
Yes, and next time you
go on about the bloody
Romans,
don't forget you're one of them.
I'm not a
Roman, and I never will be.
I'm a kike, a yid, a hebe, a hooknose,
I'm kosher,
Mum, I'm a
Red
Sea pedestrian,
and proud of it!
Sex, sex, sex, that's all they think about us.